Towers of Midnight - Chapters 51-53

In this section, Mat learns the rules while other heroes unite nations.

Brandon Sanderson doesn’t mind using a modern term if it succinctly conveys the imagery he wants. Quite possibly the only in-world characters who would use the word ‘research’ are Brown Ajah, since the very concept of research for its own sake hardly exists. A quick check reveals only Siuan and Graendal ever used the word before Brandon took the reins, and Verin and Forsaken account for most of the uses of the word in these two most recent books. So when Min talks about ‘her research’, it stands out a bit, but it still conveys intelligence, certitude, and competence. Simply talking about her research, especially after continual reminders through half the series that she has taken up this task, implies that when Min tells readers what she has found, it will be factual and trustworthy.

Rand has tried to travel to the Black Tower, but the second dreamspike has prevented him from doing it. Perrin or Egwene are the best suited to help him assault it and depose Mazrim Taim, since one of them would have to use Tel’aran’rhiod to destroy it. What kind of defenses could Moridin have placed in Tel’aran’rhiod to stop them? Before Elaida’s Foretelling about the Black Tower’s fall can take place and it is rent in fire and blood, there has to be some way for the remaining Aes Sedai to Travel there. It would be ironic if Elaida, or Suffa as she is now called, led the Seanchan portion of an assault on the Black Tower, assuming they can see eye to eye with the other nations.

The Borderlanders relied on a Foretelling of their own, one that predicted that Rand would have all of Lews Therin’s memories, and if he did not, then he was to be killed. Rand names this reckless and foolhardy, but it implies that in all the delicate weaving of the Pattern, the only path to victory for the Light is once Rand has integrated Lews Therin’s life into his own. If he had not yet done so, perhaps his death would cause the needed integration, though the matter of his resurrection would then likely be more difficult, since it too is a delicate affair relying on certain other events. The Borderlander prophecy is a failsafe, allowing the Pattern an extra more farfetched chance to set up events as needed.

Rand unites the Borderlanders behind him, thanks to Lews Therin’s memories, while Elayne gains the throne of Cairhien thanks to her ancestry and deft political maneuvers.

Two fantastic comparisons make use of other characters to not only make the comparison but provide humour and describe other parts of the world.

People knew about his scar, but there was no need to show it off like one of Luca’s bloody wagons.

Her dress was after the Ebou Dar style, with the side pinned up to reveal petticoats colorful enough to scare away a Tinker.

In the Black Tower, Pevara learns that Tarna has been turned to Taim’s side. Pevara is not yet sure, but readers feel confident this is as a result of being forcefully turned to the shadow by a circle of channelers and Myrddraal. The result is that Tarna speaks and moves normally, but her smile is all wrong, the only visible sign of being coerced to serve the Dark One. I recall that Javindhra is Black Ajah, which would be obvious in any case since both she and Tarna now share the same opinions.

Perrin reveals he will side with Rand, which unnerves Faile. But his men, now humbly apologetic about the rumours they started, will follow him anywhere, unquestioning.

Mat’s discussion of boots with Setalle Anan fits much better on a reread than when I first read it. It is the author’s humour about metaphor which throws it off, because it feels like Anan’s comments on the topic are for the reader, not Mat. Mat still makes his point, it’s not about anything but boots. Mat is simple and straightforward, and saves his best for himself, setting his own rules. The rules and expectations around nobles, Aes Sedai, and lords make it too hard to know how to behave properly and certainly prevent one from acting the way they want to. The intent of the discussion is to show Mat’s attitude towards rules just before he enters a realm where the rules make no sense, and are as anarchic to him as he is to the people around him.

Another fantastic description sets the mood before entering the Tower: A trickling, musical stream gurgled behind them.  ‘Trickling’ sounds like tricking, the musical quality speaks to the rules inside the Tower, and of course the stream is not before them or beside them, but behind them, the best place to do trickery without being seen.  

The always necessary foreshadowing has Mat remembering what he will need to remember, just not quite in the right way yet: The Eelfinn had given him the weapon. Well if they dared stand between him and Moiraine, then they would see what he could do with their gift. By providing a particular context, it is less likely the reader will think of a second context until the author reveals it dramatically later. Any hint of an incomplete thought here might leave such an opening. A second later example: “Mat had asked for a way out. They had given it to him, but he could not remember what it was. Everything had gone black, and he had awakened hanging from the ashandarei.”

Mat discovers that even in this chaotic realm, there are rules. Openings can be made to enter the tower, but there’s a trick regarding their size. The openings work in both directions, but they close once you exit the Tower. For each surprise, Mat and his companions logically think their way through, seeming capable of overcoming the obstacles placed in their path. The reader is lulled into a sense of confidence and short-lived complacency.

Despite the surroundings looking different than in past visits, Mat proceeds down two passages before doubling back to check that the map is accurate. It is not, so Mat relies on his luck to set their path. Doubling back established that reversing direction doesn’t take you where you came from, so Mat’s continued doubling back has a proven basis for working before the author shows its success.

An Eelfinn appears and tries to charm them, but is put to sleep by Thom’s song and Mat’s singing. So far, Mat thinks he has the rules all figured out.

Writing Lessons:

Foreshadow your dramatic revelation by discussing the relevant clues in a complete context so that the reader’s mind doesn’t wander down the paths you want to keep it away from.

Towers of Midnight - Chapters 29-32

In this section, the Heroes perfect their abilities.

In the early books of the series, the heroes discovered new and unusual abilities, which they subsequently used and improved upon over the rest of the series, and now they have reached a point where they are perfecting those abilities.

Perrin is being trained to use the Wolf Dream and resist its many pitfalls. Rand can singlehandedly destroy vast armies of Shadowspawn and the sight of him wielding the One Power caused Darkfriends to go mad, which isn’t a specific ability, but seems associated with his recent change of heart. Rand is also visible to Perrin in Tel’aran’rhiod, which should not be possible for a waking being. If this isn’t a vision of the window-type he used long ago, or a Dream prophecy of the kind that Egwene regularly has, then it implies that Rand is somehow in both worlds at once. This is plausible, given that Rand’s ability to change the health of the apple orchard seemed to alter reality in much the same way that one can alter reality in Tel’aran’rhiod. The True Power works in a similar fashion, allowing the user to reshape the Pattern in small ways.

My earlier theory titled The Bore is in Tel’aran’rhiod touched on this, one of its conclusions being that the Last Battle would focus on a battle of wills in Tel’aran’rhiod, with the outcome shaping reality. I further expect Tel’aran’rhiod and the waking world will become more entwined, and the ability to shape reality by thought will be made available to more people, fulfilling some of the metaphorical examples where characters have accepted or resisted their fates, shaping their own realities.   

Rand tired himself out destroying the Shadowspawn army, and tells his followers that future fighting is up to them, he will be facing the Dark One himself. This has a nifty effect on the reader. There is awe that Rand can singlehandedly do what he did, followed by concern that Rand’s battle will be even greater, while the generals will be facing a foe which can overpower them.  The scale and scope of the Last Battle are thus made known, to gleeful anticipation.

The order in which events are presented here is organized to maximize uncertainty, with Berelain and Faile worried about the outcome of Perrin’s trial, with Faile feeling betrayed by Morgase who she considers the highest ranking noble anywhere, with Galad being told that doing what is just and lawful isn’t always right, with weapons rising up to attack their owners, with Tam leaving Perrin’s side, which finally resolves the timeline lag in Perrin’s locale even as it continues to confuse readers, and finally with Elayne and Birgitte feeling queasy over the change which Aludra’s cannons will bring to the world.

All that leads up to Rand on Dragonmount, which Perrin sees as a cloud of evil seeping out of Rand, which he overcomes. The reader already knows what happens next in Rand’s timeline, but the next few chapters give truth to the wolves’ call that the decision has been made, and the Last Battle is coming.

Immediately upon that call to battle, Mat dispenses with the Gholam, then Rand easily slaughters the Shadowspawn hordes in Maradon.

I am missing something about the importance of the cannons. Birgitte’s reaction is overblown, even knowing about the various Dreams and Viewings about their invention. How can cannons change the world so much, when channelers should as easily be able to defend against cannon fire as a streak of lightning or rolling wave of earth and fire? It must simply be that the ability to kill as easily as a channeler will now be in every man’s hands, another metaphor for the ability to assert one’s reality, to resist the place one is given by the existing hierarchy.

Rand’s battle in Maradon is short and to the point, effectively demonstrating that mere Shadowspawn no longer threaten him in any way. The author uses strong visual imagery to portray Rand’s victory, with short summary phrases punctuating the battle, telling the reader what is happening from a more authoritative omniscient narrator’s voice, even though it is Ituralde’s viewpoint. Here’s a closer look:

Rand apologizes, salutes Ituralde’s troops, applauds their efforts, acknowledges their losses, and decides that the Dark One wants to break men’s spirits by forcing them to abandon the city. He refuses to allow that to happen, echoing Ituralde’s earlier recriminations about fleeing the city.

Outside the city, Rand raises a hand towards the Shadowspawn, And they started to die.

This sentence summarizes the entire battle. A few detailed events are described, then,

Light and Power exploded from the Dragon Reborn. He was like an entire army of channelers. Thousands of Shadowspawn died.

The first two sentences aren’t entirely within Ituralde’s ability to know. He could feasibly imagine Light and Power exploding from Rand, or what an army of channelers could do based on his experience with a few channelers. A few detailed events are described, then,

I’ve never seen so many weaves at once. I can’t track them all. He’s a storm. A storm of Light and streams of Power!

Using the Asha’man’s ability to describe what he is seeing is far more convincing than when Ituralde did the same moments earlier. His closing statement veers towards the omniscient narrator again. A few detailed events are described, then,

The man himself seemed to be glowing…Al’Thor seemed brighter than them all.

With the destruction and hyperbole running thick, the word seemed is inappropriate, yet is used twice. At this point, committing to the observation of his radiance is appropriate. This is the sort of weasel words that caused me to stumble over Sanderson’s early Wheel of Time chapters, although I later attributed them to Siuan’s point of view. Using them makes descriptions weaker although they sometimes add a sense of mystery or wonder. For example, throughout this blog, I consciously tried to avoid them, and simply call things as I see them, without hedging my bets with careful wording. A few detailed events are described, then

It was a masterwork. A terrible, destructive, wonderful, masterwork.

Ituralde is no craftsman, no collector of fine art, nothing more than a general and soldier so far as we know. What would he consider a masterwork? A complete rout of enemy forces? Is masterwork the most appropriate word he could have used? Once again, the narrator briefly slides in. A few detailed events are described, then

Al’Thor closed his hand into a fist, and it all ended.

The author likes these dramatic short sentences.

Writing Lessons:

Be conscious of slipping out of your narrative voice, even briefly, for it changes the context and feel of the story.

Towers of Midnight - Chapters 18-20

In this section, characters learn they must set aside their differences and work towards common goals.

Perrin begins his training in Tel’aran’rhiod. His interaction with wolves is one of the more interesting facets of his character, and to be portrayed convincingly, the wolves’ language and culture has to be distinct and recognizable. For the most part, their vocabulary is monosyllabic, implying only cursory language skills, which are supplemented with detailed scents and impressions which they can send to each other.

The longest words Hopper uses are: follow, understand, sparrow, cannot, slumber, always, remember, unnatural, honey, memory, remain, again, quickly, ready, especially, strongly, holding , carrying, running, practice, wrongness.  Of these words, most have simple meanings that are easy for readers to attribute to a clever animal’s mind. The ones which don’t are especially, holding, and unnatural. Especially is suitable for a language that can distinguish levels of gradation, not the precise terms generally used by wolves elsewhere. Holding is something men do, and in other contexts the wolves have called the objects Perrin holds his claws, as though they were part of him. Unnatural is applied to Perrin, yet the purplish wall of the dreamspike is termed wrongness, and the difference is lost on the reader. Wrongness is the more wolfish of the two, in keeping with the majority of the examples in other wolf dialogue, but it’s odd that Hopper would call Perrin’s presence unnatural if men have historically walked the Wolf Dream.

Overall, the few words wolves use which are mildly inappropriate can only be identified as such because of the consistency in tone, sentence structure, and vocabulary in the rest of their speech.

Ituralde is defending Maradon from a Trolloc horde, yet they won’t come to his aid. He holds his position, waiting for Rand to send help as was promised.

Faile confronts Berelain about the rumours, and she denies anything inappropriate happened. Wouldn’t she consider it appropriate if Perrin set aside his wife for her? In any case, Faile makes Berelain realize that Faile will challenge her to a death match unless she can find a way to dispel the rumours. Berelain concocts a plan that requires Faile and Berelain to behave as though they were friends, with no animosity between them, one of many examples of characters setting aside differences to work towards common goals.

Mat is badly failing to keep a low profile, thanks to rumours in Caemlyn which he cannot hope to quash. He meets with Elayne, and they discuss the manufacture of his dragons. The negotiation scene is heavy on dialogue. Mat says the opposite of almost every point he had made to himself before the talk began, consistently upending expectations. The negotiation ends with both Mat and Elayne satisfied at the outcome. Each of them will benefit from their arrangement, keeping a portion of the dragons, which are primarily to be used in the Last Battle. Defending against lightning strikes with the One Power is simple, so these cannonballs should be stopped as easily, unless they are deployed against Trollocs.

Mat had to sweeten the offer by giving up his sole protection against the gholam stalking him. Writers can be backed into a corner when their heroes become too powerful, and readers can see through contrived attempts to bring them back to a more normal power level. Mat giving up his medallion works effectively, because the immediate threat to Mat is obvious, and he is trading a short-term risk for a long-term gain, which is an entirely believable course of action. The reader’s emotional reaction to the threat and outrage that Mat has to give up his only defense will likely override any analysis which recognizes this deliberate effort to place Mat in a situation which he can’t easily escape.

Nynaeve takes her test to be confirmed an Aes Sedai, to be given and judged by several of the highest ranking Aes Sedai. Throughout the test, she consistently ignores the precepts placed in her mind to save the inhabitants of the test realms. She later says that without context, she can’t know why the rules have to be followed so strictly, so it is right that she flout them to act as she thinks an Aes Sedai should. There is a fierce debate about whether she should follow strictures or be trusted with forbidden weaves, or the ability to decide what the greater good is. She is raised by a narrow margin, yet by undergoing the test, she has decided she already knows what she must do, and the shawl of an Aes Sedai is a worthwhile goal, but not her ultimate goal. For this realization, she is able to claim the prize she most desires, Lan’s bond. As with the Ebou Dar scene in which they were married, Nynaeve is instantly rewarded for her personal growth.

Writing Lessons:

Portray other cultures with a consistent use of language specific to that culture.

The Gathering Storm - Prologue to Chapter 1

In this section, conventional bonds and rules are broken while Rand makes a rule he vows not to break.

A borderlander farmer and his neighbors realize the Last Battle is upon them. They drop their lives, abandoning homes to set off to make a stand with their fellow men.

A sul’dam returns to deliver a message which will require her to break the taboos of her society.

A Seanchan banner-general learns that Trollocs are no myth, violently shattering her longstanding beliefs.

Graendal travels to Moridin’s fortress, where farmers try to plant crops that resist the Blight. Moridin lets her learn the other Forsaken’s plans, and unexpectedly, Semirhage is hung out to dry. Rand is to be unharmed, except in his heart, where she is to bring him anguish.

Ituralde surprises a much larger Seanchan army.

Masema the prophet is killed by Faile, who does what her husband cannot, killing the man who represents strict adherence to rules and the Light.

Most of these short sections show the bonds holding men being broken, in fact or metaphorically. The last one shows Faile killing the personification of rules that bind. The breaking of bonds, the end of custom, the shattering of ties between men. If this prologue matches the ones from past books, then we should see a lot more of this theme, and we will, especially as pertains to Rand.

Masema and Aram were each killed by Faile or Perrin, and each represented truth and strict adherence to convention and rules. This fits in with the discussion of their necessary dalliances in the previous book.

Demandred claims his rule is secure and he gathers for war. With talk of the role he should have been playing, keeping an eye on Rand the way Osan’gar was, his affinity for using proxies, the claim that his rule is secure, and the emphasis on channelers in the Last Battle, a reader should once again be hard pressed not to conclude that the least possible involvement Demandred could have with Mazrim Taim is telling him what to do, which is to gather an army of male channelers.

Rand surveys the countryside of Arad Doman, noting a pattern breakdown causing the wind to blow the wrong way, against itself. It is not the trees, but Rand’s banners which are blowing the wrong way though, a subtle clue that it is he who is at odds with the Pattern, that something is more wrong with him than reality, despite the many signs of it failing around him. The way his eyesight is blurred is a symbol for the difficulty he has in seeing things the way a normal man should. His sight and his view are both distorted. Setting the line that cannot be crossed, he says to himself: ‘ “You will question her, but you will not hurt her!”Not a woman. I will keep to this one shred of light inside of me. I’ve caused the deaths and sorrows of too many women already.’ No sooner stated, this rule is destined to be broken, as indicated by the themes in the prologue.

Moridin had ordered Semirhage to capture Rand, presumably to break him before the Last Battle. He must have two plans, one for if he is captured, one for if he remains free. The orders to Graendal to break his heart only become necessary because Semirhage failed. In either situation, the goal is to break Rand’s spirit.

A few bits of vocabulary and phrasing stood out as peculiar. I think they are more likely artifacts of Sanderson’s wording than Jordan choosing new words, because in past books his odd vocabulary included obscure words like widdershins, not contemporary words. Jordan was very good at avoiding contemporary words. Here are the examples I found:

Like the funnel cloud of a twister.

This ain’t no southerner wetfarm.

Rand’s peculiar apology to Merise: ‘Yes, yes Merise. I’m not trying to command you.’

Wouldn’t it just be ‘one of the High Blood’? Like the hair crest of a member of the High Blood.

They were well inside the Seanchan defensive perimeter.

Lews Therin’s rambles have no pronoun. Should have killed him. Should have killed them all. An oversight? Meant to make Lews Therin sound madder? There has usually been a distinct I, You, or We when Lews Therin speaks, signifying the distinct personality. Is this meant to show him growing indistinct from Rand?

Writing Lessons:

Using contemporary words, or older words, or futuristic words all have an effect on how the reader perceives the world you’ve created.

Knife of Dreams - Chapters 26-27

In this section, a jumble of viewpoints leads up to Rand getting injured.

Following Egwene’s lengthy chapter, the next viewpoints are short, and are divided oddly amongst the chapters. Here are the viewpoints, the number of pages in each, and the chapter they fall in.

Chapter 25: Tarna 6, Mat 12

Chapter 26: Tuon 12, Perrin 15, Faile 3

Chapter 27 : Rand 15, Mat 9

It is an odd partition to have Tuon’s viewpoint sharing a chapter with Perrin, when the viewpoint immediately preceding it was Mat’s, who is in the same locale as Tuon. Why not have shorter chapters with no shared viewpoints? Why throw a Mat section at the end of a Rand section, when there is no logical link between Rand’s and Mat’s actions? Tarna’s viewpoint was filled with trepidation, Mat’s also, but less so. Mat is more in control of events once he meets up with his army again. Tuon’s section is back to mild confusion and study of the situation. Perrin is nothing but preparation for conflict, and worry for how it may pan out. Faile is down to a desperate gamble. The range of emotions these characters feel is similar to what Rand has gone through in preparing to meet the Seanchan. Trepidation, study, preparation, and a gamble at the end. But it’s not just Rand; each of these characters also went through something similar in their predicaments. The viewpoints are divided this way to avoid repeating each character going through similar emotions, which could make for arduous reading. The emotions and concerns expressed in each of the sections stands for the others as well. And in the end, each of the characters will make their gamble, knowing that there is a knife-thin margin between victory and defeat, which relates back to the rhyme at the opening of the book. All of these plotlines are linked thematically.  

The Tuon section reveals that surprisingly, she knows as little of Mat as he does of her. Even as a willing prisoner, Tuon plots how to undermine the enemies of her Empire, considering ways in which she can make life difficult for him or his army. Tuon’s inner thoughts have been kept from readers to maintain the mystery around her, so that they are unsure of where Mat stands with her. As their royal wedding nears, it is finally time to reveal some, but not all, of what her goals are, and how she thinks of Mat. This is an excellent opportunity to switch from his viewpoint to hers, since the author’s objective is now to keep some mystery around Mat’s brilliant plan to escape Altara.

Perrin’s plans are much less secret. Readers have been told about the Forkroot, and how Perrin will sneak some men inside the city to help Faile escape, which are the major tricky parts, the rest simply being placement of the troops. Perrin is able to put aside worries about Whitecloaks nearby, more Shaido septs reinforcing his enemies, and a ripple in the Pattern that feels as though he will be undone. That ripple represents how he may become undone by the secrets Faile may be keeping, but his singular focus lets him dismiss it, as he would dismiss anything Faile had done amongst the Shaido. He has an objective, and he will not let moral obstacles prevent him from reuniting with Faile any more than physical ones.

Perrin’s thought on Berelain are so forthright, I can’t help but feel his perspective is wrong: “Light, how could anyone believe there was anything between him and her? She was as beautiful as ever, true, yet the scent that had minded him of a hunting cat was so long gone from her smell that he barely remembered it. The bedrock of her scent was patience and resolve, now. She had come to accept that he loved Faile and only Faile, and she seemed as determined to see Faile freed as he was.” Berelain doesn’t give up, and Perrin’s smells are unerring, so Perrin has either misinterpreted what the smell means or is not being entirely truthful. It’s quite a leap to start suspecting that a bluntly honest character such as Perrin is hiding something that he can’t even address in his inner thoughts, something that contradicts the text told from his perspective. Consider this possibility: Perrin was ready to make a deal with the Dark One to get Faile back, and may have needed Berelain’s help so bad, he gives in to her as the price. Having paid her price, he tries to pretend nothing happened, to which she replied: “Very well Perrin, if that’s the way you want it.” Whether it is true or not, the author has carefully crafted the discussion between these two the morning he woke in her tent, so that a hidden meaning can be gleaned. Enough to raise suspicion, not enough to prove anything. Other clues point to a hidden meaning in the above passage as well: how exposed must she be for him to know the bedrock of her scent?  Why would she no longer smell like a hunting cat, unless she had already caught her prey? Could his forgetting that smell represent him hardly remembering what they did together? Obviously, there is never a Berelain point of view because that would reveal what is meant to never be revealed. Writing with double meaning, or to imply a double meaning, takes a particular attention and skill.

For her part, Faile is involved in rebuffing Rolan’s suggestions that they play kissing games. She plays coy with him, unwilling to lose a potential escape route. Faile hopes that the Aes Sedai Galina proves true, or she may have to take up Rolan’s offer. Readers know Galina is lying, and this represents Faile’s only truthful option being taken away. Faile recognizes that her only slim hope of not having to hide anything from Perrin lies with this woman, who is frantic and unpredictable. Giving the Oath Rod to Galina represents Faile trying to tell the truth about Rolan. The results would be unpredictable, possibly wild, with no guarantees despite Faile trying to force one out of her. The next post will further delve into the symbolism of Galina.

Rand confronts Semirhage, and loses a hand and his eyesight for it. With two other characters having somewhat successful interactions with Seanchan, there is still some expectation for Rand to come out of this well, despite Suroth’s involvement. There is some mild confusion about timing, as readers may be led to believe this scene takes place after Tuon’s return to Ebou Dar, so that Rand can meet her. The confusion is quickly resolved by the revelation that Semirhage was disguised as Tuon. Semirhage represents pain, based on her reputation, but Rand refuses to acknowledge any pain, whether from his old wounds or the loss of his hand. He is effectively cutting himself off from feeling anything, the wounds to his soul somehow eclipsing the grave physical wounds he has taken.

This uncaring sentiment is echoed when Mat refuses to give aid to the Seanchan soldiers he has cut down with his new tactics. Tuon approves: “A lion can have no mercy.”

Writing Lessons:

Unreliable narrators may require you to write true things with double meanings, not deal with certain things, or write outright lies.

Crossroads of Twilight - Epilogue

The epilogue offers a rare opportunity to do a very detailed analysis of almost every word. My old friend Scartoe says that every word a writer chooses serves a purpose. Why is each word there? Why this word and not that one? The epilogue is 267 words long. First, read the full passage, then below, the analysis. In terms of action and plot, this is as simple as it gets. Rand is waiting for Bashere. Bashere enters and gives Rand the news he’s been waiting for.

Rand stared out of the window at the steady rain falling out of a gray sky. Another storm down out of the Spine of the World. The Dragonwall. He thought spring must be coming soon. Spring always came, eventually. Earlier here than back home, it should be, though there seemed little sign of it. Lightning forked silver-blue across the sky, and long moments passed before the peal of thunder. Distant lightning. The wounds in his side ached. Light, the herons branded into his palms ached, after all this time.

Sometimes, pain is all that lets you know you’re alive, Lews Therin whispered, but Rand ignored the voice in his head.

The door creaked open behind him, and he looked over his shoulder at the man who came into the sitting room. Bashere was wearing a short, gray silk coat, a rich shimmering coat, and he had the baton of the Marshal-General of Saldaea, an ivory rod tipped with a golden wolf’s head, tucked behind his belt next to his scabbarded sword. His turned-down boots had been waxed until they shone. Rand tried not to let his relief show. They had been gone long enough.

“Well?” he said.

“The Seanchan are amenable,” Bashere replied. “Crazy as loons, but amenable. They require a meeting with you in person, though. The Marshal-General of Saldaea isn’t the Dragon Reborn.”

“With this Lady Suroth?”

Bashere shook his head. “Apparently a member of their royal family has arrived. Suroth wants you to meet someone called the Daughter of the Nine Moons.”

Thunder rolled again for distant lightning.

Short and powerful. Here’s the analysis:

Rand stared out of the window at the steady rain falling out of a gray sky. Another weather-as-mood analogy. Steady rain implies long unhappy times. Staring implies he’s been looking for a while, which makes it a better choice than ‘watching’ or ‘looking’. Another storm down out of the Spine of the World. Saying ‘another storm’ amplifies the rain to a concept of continual rain and bad times. Using ‘down’ adds to the negative mood. The Spine of the World evokes a forlorn place, much better than a storm out of Haddon Mirk, or elsewhere. The Dragonwall. He didn’t have to say Dragonwall at all here. It has a dual meaning here, referring to the walls Rand has erected in his heart. He thought spring must be coming soon. Now Rand is looking for hope, symbolized by spring. “He thought it must be” is a statement that almost guarantees the speaker is wrong. Spring always came, eventually. This sentence starts out as an affirmation, but ends with doubt. The word ‘eventually’ has more impact placed at the end of the sentence, where it can undermine the entire section that precedes it. Earlier here than back home, it should be, though there seemed little sign of it. The words ‘it should be’ again showing that Rand is wrong. This sentence is not necessary given the earlier part of the paragraph, but it introduces the concept of home, with associated feelings of warmth and comfort. The reference to home shows regret on Rand’s part. He wants to get back to a place of comfort and peace. Lightning forked silver-blue across the sky, and long moments passed before the peal of thunder. A sentence with no apparent relevance to the plot. At first glance it only describes the storm further. But the choice of words makes it resonate very closely with the mood being crafted. ‘Forked’ is used to evoke a choice. ‘Long moments’ pass to evoke waiting. ‘Peal’ is close to ‘appeal’.  Distant lightning. If the lightning represents the Light, then it is far, far away from Rand. The wounds in his side ached. The wounds are always a representation of the Shadow and of the evil that comes from fighting the Shadow at all costs. Light, the herons branded into his palms ached, after all this time. Another reference to a long period of unhappiness. His brands never really hurt before; this is about the burden that comes with those Herons. It shows Rand in a state of mind where the pain caused by the Shadow is no greater than the pain caused by the Light.

The first paragraph is thick with mood, showing Rand moping, waiting, faintly hoping. It tells us where the story is happening and a bit about the environment where this scene will take place.

Sometimes, pain is all that lets you know you’re alive, Lews Therin whispered, but Rand ignored the voice in his head. Rand ignores Lews Therin like he would ignore his conscience. Lews Therin doesn’t ‘say’, he only whispers, indicating he is weak or timid. His idea is introduced with the word ‘sometimes’, as though he is scared to commit to an idea that Rand might dismiss. His tortured thought is still striving to find a bright side to the pain, but Rand won’t even allow that mild of a happy thought, which is a good direct example of his mood.

The door creaked open behind him, and he looked over his shoulder at the man who came into the sitting room. No knocks, no calls of “hello”, just a creaking door. Looking over his shoulder is an expression of mistrust. The man’s name isn’t given immediately, to heighten that mistrust. It could be anybody, maybe even an assailant. Bashere was wearing a short, gray silk coat, a rich shimmering coat, and he had the baton of the Marshal-General of Saldaea, an ivory rod tipped with a golden wolf’s head, tucked behind his belt next to his scabbarded sword. Bashere’s accessories convey wealth and power. His formal rank is given to remind the reader how powerful he is, which will be relevant soon. His coat shimmers, his rod is ivory and gold, all of which convey brightness and light. His sword and rod represent power, which is tucked away but ready at hand.  His turned-down boots had been waxed until they shone. Another representation of light and brightness. ‘Waxed’ has another meaning which implies he is in a state of fullness. ‘Turned-down’ and ‘boots’ have other meanings too, associated with rejection. Rand tried not to let his relief show. Rand’s first fully described emotion is relief. But he tries not to show it to the man he is relieved to see. They had been gone long enough. Is Rand worried they might have been captured or killed? Is he impatient to start his next endeavour? A blunt statement like this tells readers what Rand’s concern was, but provides no context, making it a mystery.

“Well?” he said. Using ‘said’ or ‘replied’ keeps the conversation normal. Normal for Rand is a vague monosyllabic demand which Bashere must interpret. Rand’s impatience and unreasonableness is conveyed powerfully by this single word.

“The Seanchan are amenable,” Bashere replied. Bashere also keeps the conversation normal. His response is blunt too, but uses a grandiose word. ‘Amenable’ implies the Seanchan can be persuaded or controlled. “Crazy as loons, but amenable. Loons have been used several times to describe crazy people, but lunatics only once, by Mat. The idea that they are crazy adds to the prejudice that Rand can control them. This sentence is the only one that gives an idea of what negotiations may be like. Without it, the conversation would be blander. They require a meeting with you in person, though. Persuading the Seanchan means meeting a condition or two. This is the first condition. The Marshal-General of Saldaea isn’t the Dragon Reborn.” This is the payoff for stating Bashere’s full title earlier. Despite his resplendent outfit Bashere isn’t who the Seanchan want.

“With this Lady Suroth?” Danger! Readers know she’s a Darkfriend.

Bashere shook his head.  The author could have just said no in the reply, but an action conveys the same and keeps this short discussion from being a pair of talking heads.  “Apparently a member of their royal family has arrived. Using the word ‘apparently’ shows Bashere doesn’t take everything the Seanchan say at face value. It’s a short way to convey that, because it would probably require a full sentence otherwise. Suroth wants you to meet someone called the Daughter of the Nine Moons.” This revelation should cause unease and confusion. It is uncertain whether this scene takes place long after Mat’s recent scene, so it is unclear whether Tuon is back in Ebou Dar. Using her title instead of her name adds to that confusion. ‘Someone’ makes the statement less precise, and may indicate more doubt from Bashere.

Thunder rolled again for distant lightning. Going back to the earlier metaphor, Rand is no closer to the Light than he was before, and the thunder has an ominous feel to accentuate the last paragraph’s revelation.

Robert Jordan isn’t always this crisp, so this epilogue is a pleasure to read.

Writing Lessons:

Every word a writer chooses serves a purpose.

Winter's Heart - Chapters 17-19

In this section, Mat fatefully encounters a number of women and decides he must attempt a daring rescue. Again.

Mat meets almost every important woman of the next few months of his life in these chapters: Aludra, Setalle, Tylin, Egeanin, Tuon, Anath, Suroth, Teslyn, Joline, Edesina.

The Mat chapters have a very distinctive voice, so let’s take a look at how Robert Jordan creates that voice so that the reader can tell these sections are from Mat’s point of view.

The words he uses to describe Mat’s actions always have a tone of carelessness or haste or suddenness about them. The foxhead medallion is stuffed into his coat pocket, so he can snatch it out of need be; flinging open the doors; the plan had just occurred to him; he sank into one of the bamboo carved chairs; ignoring the protests of his leg, Mat moved faster than he thought he ever had in his life; he went straight to Tylin’s apartments; he walked to the first and opened the door long enough to peek in; he unconsciously began humming. Mat’s section contained no fights, no action, just walking and meetings with various people, yet it has an intensity that comes from the words that describe Mat’s actions, as well as his description of other people’s actions. Mat’s life is filled with spontaneity, impulsiveness, and unpredictability, even if it involves him doing nothing more than walking across the room.

Mat is fairly obsessed with the opposite sex in comparison to the other men in the story. Other male characters certainly enjoy the sight and company of the women around them, but in Mat point of view chapters, physical observations of the opposite sex are moved to the front: the statue of Queen Nariene has three possible explanations for its pose, one of which involves a bared breast; “Mud?” he said to a pretty, smiling maid spreading her skirts in a curtsy; (Tylin) pale green lace trimmed the oval opening in her gown that half exposed her full breasts;  (Suroth) a pretty enough woman despite her hair being shaved to that long crest; (Anath) imperiously beautiful, she put Tylin and Suroth both in the shade; (servants) the yellow-haired man in his indecent garment was not the only one either. A slim but nicely rounded red-haired woman wearing the same sheer robe was kneeling beside a table; (Selucia) a short woman with half her golden head shaved and a bosom that might outmatch Riselle’s. The author does not hold Mat back from expressing his interests, and that gives Mat a unique voice in the story.

To a lesser extent, Mat’s other interests in horses, gambling, wealth acquisition, and battle (or battle avoidance) crop up regularly. Anything that doesn’t fit those interests is quickly dismissed. This narrow focus allows the author to drop obvious hints to the reader while Mat cheerily skims over these details. Playing into this behaviour allows many humourous situations to be created.

Even without that, a great deal of humour comes from Mat’s exaggerated view of even mundane situations. Mat is prone to exaggerate more than anyone else, making his point of view distinctive: what good it would do if she still swallowed the whole faradiddle; her muscular husband was a fishing –boat captain with more dueling scars than Mat wanted to think about; Light, did the whole city know?; he kept shooting frowns at his workmen as though suspecting they would lie down and go to sleep if he did not maintain a close watch on them. A dead man could not have slept in that heat; the day after he first kissed the Illuminator, the grandmotherly maids disappeared from her chambers, replaced by women white-haired and wizened; No one could be friends with Suroth; With dozens of Seanchan just the other side of a door guarded by a cook with a spoon; her ageless face still looked as if she ate briars three meals a day.

Any one of the elements described above could lend a strong voice to a character, but when you combine several of them the effect is multiplied, and the voice becomes unique and memorable.

Writing Lessons:

Create a distinctive voice for your characters by playing up some aspects of their behaviour and playing down others, in content, word choice, and tone.

The Path of Daggers - Chapters 8-9

By the original schedule, I would have been done the series shortly. Instead, I am just past half done. It's still very rewarding, but it is a constant battle to impose writing regularly over the other events life throws at me. Thanks for your patience and sticking around!

In this section, new and old groups in Perrin’s camp are keeping secrets. Maybe.

Perrin’s main problems have been presented already, now we get to see some of the tools and people at his disposal.

The camp promises to be simpler to deal with than his current predicament. It presents some mild difficulties which are easily dealt with, as the description of its location implies: The camp lay about a league further on, well back from the road, among low wooded hills, just beyond a stream that was ten paces’ width of stones and only five of water never deeper than a man’s knees.

It is composed of three parts: Mayener, Aiel, and Two Rivers men. The difficulties stem from none of the factions really being sure the others share the same goal. The newcomers led by Morgase may make yet another faction, despite that Lini is advocating that they try fit into their new roles since their old lives are done with.

The factions differ on several issues, including whether Perrin should fly his banners, and whether Masema should be killed or brought to heel. While Perrin worries over the untold secrets among his current followers, he accepts at face value the story told by Morgase’s followers. Even his wife’s own followers have secret missions they carry out on Faile’s behalf!

Faile’s idea to fly the banners to distract attention away from Perrin’s true objective brings some comments from Perrin: Quicksilver. A kingfisher flashing by faster than thought. Both descriptions of Faile’s idea not only imply speed, but the quality of her idea, and her rank or position as well. Kingfishers may not be the only fast birds, but the words king and fisher offer the idea of leadership and correctness. Silver implies wealth and rarity.

With Perrin being so trusting, details about what the factions are up to can only be delivered by points of view of those involved in them, so Faile and Morgase sections tell us about their plans and plights. Even after Dumai’s Wells, Faile thinks kidnapping is the best means to get to Alliandre. Rand may not appreciate having his allies treated the way he was, even if handled gently.

The fear of hidden agendas is everywhere. The farriers worry that Perrin has some ulterior motive in examining their work with horseshoes when all he wants is a chance to do something for himself instead of people scurrying to serve him.

Unintentionally, Perrin finds himself doing the exact sort of subterfuge he dislikes, laying rumours among the Mayeners about his intentions regarding Manetheren, and somehow gaining more direct support from them while Berelain is away. It’s not something a ruler is bound to like.

Finally Perrin accuses the Aiel Wise Ones of having secret plans for the Aes Sedai, possibly involving murder. The Wise Ones and Aes Sedai both tell him to mind his own business, this is just normal apprenticing, though it began against the Wise Ones intentions. They also hide nothing regarding Masema, they would prefer him dead, sooner rather than later.

In general, things are not what they seem at the surface. Those who seem to be hiding secrets are not, while Perrin overlooks the many secrets being hidden by those he trusts. We’ve now met everyone in the camp except the Asha’man, but there will soon be more new arrivals. Overall it feels like an exceptionally long introduction to the people tagging along with Perrin. As I postulated back in Perrin’s section which open The Dragon Reborn, one reason Perrin’s sections may seem to move slower is because they are Perrin sections. His manner of observing and taking action demands a slower pace, and a very complete oversight of all the relevant people and places around him. Portraying Perrin as a slow and methodical person would be more difficult if his Point of View chapters jumped about rapidly. This translates into impatience for the reader.

Writing Lessons:

You can portray character by the pacing, tone, and setting of the story, not just by their reaction to events.